i Your 2006 Horror-Scopic Review Courtesy of Swami Albrecht  (Not associated with any organized religion or human sub-species - send your large, cash donations and I will form a non-profit; please, do it quickly)
CAPRA-CORN (If you don't ask, Clarence won't tell) December 23-January 19	Dec 30 The Lady Vanishes Former neighbor Catherine Thomas does a hit and run dinner engagement in Der Wood	Dec 30 Brookside Gardens Xmas Display - the train you never had	Jan 01 The Trouble with George (You can dress him up, but he'll slobber his drink all over hisself)	Jan 17 - Only 2 more years till my second quinquennial 50th Birthday Party - tickets are going fast!
ASPARAGUS (Your pee smells funny)   January 20-February 19	North by Northwest Business trip to Fort Lewis, WA took up half of January, then it was vacation time in WA and OR (the rain even stopped for us!)
	Feb 04 Had a nice visit with Sparky and his Sparkette	Feb 05 Multnomah Falls - Columbia River Valley	Feb 06 Mt. St. Helen ain't gellin', she's swellin'...	Feb 06 Two crotchety old Geezers named George
	Feb 08 Displaced Derwoodians - The Tensens, now in Seattle	Feb 08 Terror Target #1 in the Pacific NW	Feb 09 Nightingale rescued from bar scene... (Val Piacenti)	Feb 18 - Took a group of wounded soldiers from Walter Reed to an Army-Navy wrestling match in Annapolis; they were more grossed out eating Maryland crabs than with their own wounds. What a great bunch of heroic young kids!
PI-SEIZE (You'll never make it past 3.14159.....) February 20-March 20	Feb 20 - Military-Industrial Complex meeting held at Hamburger Hamlet (no photos permitted*) Feb 24 - The same-old same-old Wine Tasting event Mar 02 - Military-Industrial Complex meeting held at Cheescake Factory (no photos permitted*)	Mar 03 - Corey Hewitt has open house at his DC digs - nice! Mar 09 - I pass up opportunity to see The Flying Karamazov Brothers; am I nuts, or what?	Mar 19 Dial M for Manser Linguist, world-citizen, former French Foreign Legionnaire, Dien Ben Phu POW, senior US Army Non-Com and US Forest Ranger, Paul Manser (in jacket) is ready to leave Switzerland for the U.S. Soldiers' and Airmen's Home, Washington, D.C.  We await your triumphant return!	* i.e., forgot camera
HAIRIES (Your taste in women is dubious)      March 21-April 20	Not THAT Harries!
	Apr 04 Sleazy Contractors Mug High Government Official - High Government Official Mugs for Camera	Apr 06 Family Plot Parisis to rule the world. News at 11:00	Apr 08 Spellbound How's he balance an egg on a spatula?  And why would he do it?	Apr 11 Celebrating another of Mike's successful returns from Iraq. Let's not be playing Deal or No Deal, OK?
PINTO (You do not like being rear-ended) April 21-May 21	Headed to the Carolinas This time to Fort Jackson.  Frenzy - Too many people to see; too little time.
	May 07 Greenville, SC Cousin Ursula and Maxi (RIP)	May 08 Rose	May 10 Verna	May 11 Sandra & Perry (Comedy Club - oh, yeah!)
	May 12 Lawlors	May 14 Pattys (also HS buds)	Spellbound II ----> Former Chicago Heights next door neighbors and High School classmates attend 60th birthday party of same mutual friend in Virginia.  Incredible! And they look stupid, too!	May 20 Larry Fazzini
JIMINY (Thank goodness there's not two of you)   May 22-June 22	~May 15 - Brigitta goes to work for Montgomery County Board of Elections.  Do not try saying this with a Japanese accent. May 27 Ever try to use the word Topaz in a caption?  Just doesn't work.	Jun 05 - Busted windshield gets replaced May 28 - Busted gut gets clean bill of health Jun 22 - Leo C celebrates "a big one" (cheers, mate! and many more "big ones" to come!)	Secret Agent time again - boondoggle to Cape Cod
			Jun 17 Bamberg Crewe	Jun 19 Chicano Heights Crewe
CHANCRE  (You should not go to unknown places) June 23-July 23	Boondoggle to Cape Cod (con't)		Jul 09 Notorious What happens at Hoover Dam stays at Hoover Dam. Uncle Jam hosts pre-Korea deployment weekend for Rob. Jam, you da Man! Jul 12-15 - Stan Gulba visiting from Poland. Send photos, Stan! Jul 19 - Happy (?) hour with COL Patrick Kelly, US Marnie Corps	Jul 22 Suspicion Would Adams pick up the tab?  He did.  YES!!  What a guy! Jul 23-24 - Lawlors visit Brigitta from NC. Relative pay-back time. Jul 28 - Davie-San, is your Uncle Happy?
	Jun 23 A girl in every port ! Some Port in every girl ! (I prefer the short, elderly ones myself....)	Jun 23 Foreign Correspondent I can always depend on David Wigglesworth for a postcard from Deutschland
LEE O. (You should change your name to Yves Adele Harlow) July 24-August 23	Jul 29 Another venue with soldiers from Walter Reed.  Tickets, picnic, backstage tour - Good Vibrations!	Aug 07 The Waitschies(es?) Stay in touch, folks.	Aug 15-20 - Long drive to Fort Drum (Watertown), NY for "bid-ness".	Aug 20 Rebecca Wedding prep for the kids, Carlisle, PA. On the trip back from Ft Drum.
VIGGO (Beware if a deformed Psycho asks you for a cuppa Joe)  August 24-September 23	Aug 26 Brigitta's daughter (Liz) and husband (Dave Garrison) throw a really good belated wedding reception.		Aug 29 - My dryer gets repaired; not that little one in the bathroom cabinet that you use on your hair. The big boxy thing near the furnace. Well, you can use that one on your hair, too, if you kinda jimmie the switch. Whatever.
	Fort Leavenworth, KS (Sep 5-15) on off hours... A veritable hotbed of activity. |---------------------------------------------------------| V                                                                                    V			Sep 21 Hospitality Club #1 The Boys from Lithuania
	Sep 9 Little bit of Rope, little bit of yarn, little bit of cloth, maybe you get a Torn Curtain?  Maybe you get folk art, buster!	Sep 10 To Catch a Nap HRH Augusta, aka the Pink Princess, with mom and dad.	Sep 13 I Confess.... There is no easy way to explain how Don and Polly can fly from Memphis to KCMO so they can go to visit Don in Lincoln, NE.	Sep 21 Military-Industrial Complex meeting held at JR's (smuggled photo; death warrant and fatwah are pending)
D-BRA (You knew her as Debra in college - actually, you knew her as Leon Shermer in HS) September 24-October 23	Don't bother ! Nothing here !	Sep 28 Art Fitch getting apoplectic after he said he'd pick up the tab...	Sep 28 Hospitality Club #2 plus a business visit from bro' Bill	Sep 30 Ja, come fight for das Vaterland!
	Korea - Land of the Morning Clam, uh, Calm   October 05-16 Final business trip of the year gave me the opportunity to travel to South Korea, where my son Rob is stationed with the US Army.  He is near the city of Uijongbu, allegedly the stomping grounds of Radar O'Reilly, Hawkeye Pierce, and COL Potter.  Sometimes Rob relates that a MASH-like environment is still evident in the area....
	The Wrong Man "It's about et-ics" (Miller's Crossing) - Rob in his BOQ with his stunt double, Jon Polito	No DMZ Tour?  That's OK; substitute Snakes on a Plane at the local Quonset Hut Theater	Oh, hello dere, Missah Kim!	We were scheduled for a tour of the DMZ with the USO, but because of the military exercise (and a nuke - or not) the actual tour was cancelled. So Rob had to take us on a virtual tour instead.
	California, Here We Were The Land of Fruits and Nuts and Flakes, none of which are reflected in these photos, of course. Brigitta met me in Sacramento after I returned from Korea; since I flew into SF and she flew into Sacramento, many thanks go out to Chuck Adams and Jane Hennessy (SF) and Mike and Helen DeLaurentis (Sacramento) for their generous help in putting us up in different cities on different schedules with different arrival and departure times. You guys are great.  Or at least you were when you did that. I don't know about now.....
	Oct 16 The Guys Who Know Too Much - International finance and all that "stuff"	Oct 17 The G-Man near Half-Moon Bay	Oct 18 Mike & Ike	Oct 19 Strangers on a (Napa Valley Wine) Train
	Oct 20 Gonna need a Lifeboat to get you off the sandbar if you eat all that!	Oct 20 Bodega Bay's Birds - PhotoShopper's dream	Oct 20 Show me the way to Petaluma Florence Piepenbrink - friend of my mom's	Oct 21 Cupertino, CA Fr. Jack Rielly - friend of my folks.  Analyzing the Vatican's balance sheet.
	Yosemite and Sequoia NPs
	Oct 22-23 39 Steps (or more) to Moro Rock - watch out for Vertigo when you get to the top	Oct 23-24 El Portal exit That's Spanish for "a portal in the shape of an 'L' "	Oct 23 Inspiration Point Pretty, well, inspiring! El Capitan, Half-Dome & Yosemite Sam Falls. WEEE-hah!  Dadgummit!	Oct 23 Tuolumne Meadows Don't you use that stuff to clean paint brushes?
SERPICO (All you want is for Leon to be happy) October 24-November 22	Nov 02 Notice that sunlight is coming in through the Rear Window?  Of course you do.	Nov 04 - 60th Birthday Party for Stephanie Curtis (what a great lady; and Tom didn't even make her cook!)  ----> Nov 06 - I get rewired; at least my utility room does.  Anybody know a good wallboard guy?	Nov 11 Brigitta & The Curtises Rockville now has a brand new Li-bary and the Friends of the Library held a woo-hoo opening ceremony to prove it.	Nov 20 - The Tensens visit Derwood from Seattle (see Feb 08 entry) for an early Thanksgiving. For some reason, the photos taken are so hideous that they can't be shown here.  I mean there wasn't one good photo of any of us during the entire evening. You know what I'm sayin'? Hey, there's no sense in EMBARRASSING anyone, is there?
SNUFFLEUPAGUS  (You should stop drinking - really!) November 23-December 22	Nov 23 - Thanksgiving Goodgoshamighty!  MaryBeth makes her first turkey and it's superb! Nov 24 More HS friends show up!	Nov 27 An honor and privilege. Stay safe in those Iraqi skies, Chris.	Dec 1-4 Over 410 years of experience ! (Don't ask in what.) Even MORE HS friends show up for a DC-Baltimore "culture & shopping" weekend. HQ'd in Derwood. Damage Assessment in progress.	Dec 7 COL (Ret) Don Stevens at St Barbara's Day Luncheon, Ft Belvoir. Rob, pay attention: this is the guy who helped establish MacGregor Range!
	Nov-Dec - Brother Don & family move from FL to IL (Lisle - wasn't that the name of the #2 daughter in Sound of Music?). Need any Pepperidge Farm cookies?  Be nice to him.
	Dec 13 Saboteurs? More like Parkway Patriots! Military-Industrial Complex meeting held at undisclosed location near Hamburger Hamlet, Crystal City, VA	Dec 14-22 - Lots of projected parties, concerts and get-togethers on the horizon. Here's hoping your holidays are treatable with low-dose medications.  Ho-dee-ho-ho!

Rest in Peace 2006	CPT Matt Mattingly Rob's XU Classmate KIA - Iraq	Bob Farmer My Dad's WWII buddy	Jack Lund Pam Craft's dad	Elmer Joy “Cris” Potts Zoe & Jeremy's Grandpa
Good people, all

Once again, best wishes to the rest of you whose paths crossed with mine this year, but otherwise have been spared the ignominy of photographic evidence....

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